I am not Super Mom.
There, I said it. No, I’m not fishing for compliments or trying to reaffirm my awesomeness. I’m honestly telling you that I am not as strong and wonderful as everyone thinks I am.
Sure, I try to be. And just like everyone else, I fall flat on my face more often than not. I see how moms everywhere secretly try to outdo each other. I’m on Pinterest. I go to parties at my kids’ schools. One mom has a huge score with an adorable treat or craft, and all the sudden, she gets labeled Super Mom.
That is a scary and dangerous title to be given.
I have a feeling that most moms are more alike than different; everyone is just trying to be a “good mom”. Whatever that means. To me, it means teaching my children that no matter what, they are loved. It means being their parent and not necessarily their friend (that will probably come into play more later, as they get older). It means teaching them to respect others (ALL others), use their manners, and to find the beauty in anything. It means instilling values into them that will serve them well their entire lives: being kind, working hard, staying true to themselves. It means advocating my ass off to ensure my child with Down syndrome gets what he needs (and will mean advocating for the other two if/when that time comes). Of course, it also means teaching them to do their homework, clean their rooms, brush their teeth…all that basic parenting stuff. I try to expose them to new cultural ideas, feed them organic vegetables, and keep the house spotless. Actually, I stress out if they aren’t getting those things in their daily routines.
Even if they get all that, though, I’m still not Super Mom. I feed my kids Happy Meals. I let them watch Sponge Bob. Sometimes I give in to things I probably shouldn’t, just so I get some peace and quiet. I realize that some of you reading this probably have to stop and pick yourself up off the floor. That’s ok. Judge me all you like, for deep down, I know you have some Mommy Secrets that you are not terribly proud of, and judging me just makes yourself feel a little better about those things.
I would encourage you, though, to come to terms with those issues. It’s ok. Being a parent is totally a work in progress. Nobody gets it “right” the first time, and what is “right” for you is not going to be “right” for me. Stop comparing yourself to other parents, because that isn’t fair to anybody. As with everything else in the world, live and let live. As long as your kids are loved (ok, and fed and clean and educated), then you are doing your job. Let’s put the Super Mom myth to rest, shall we?
Now, I’m off to treat my youngest to a sugary donut before we rush off to dance class and school. That totally makes me Super Mom in his book…and since it’s coming from him, I’ll take it.