Complete Chaos – My Messy Beautiful

Chaos.  It’s inevitable, especially in this household.  For example, right now I’m beginning to compose this post while I’m on hold with tech support for my contract gig, Addie is bouncing up and down just a few feet away from me because she is dying to ask a question, Andrew has the dog in (what he believes is) a loving headlock, and Al is throwing his Hot Wheels cars down the stairs, one by one.  The tv is blaring, the dishwasher is humming, and the dryer is fluffing that same load of laundry that has already been fluffed three times.

This is not out of the ordinary.

Every parent, I’m sure, can relate to this type of commotion.  It really doesn’t even feel like chaos any more, because it’s the norm.  If someone else was to knock on my door right now, though, their jaw may drop. This place is a mess.  The kids are wild.  I’m exhausted.  But, it’s what we do.

The bedtime countdown has already started in my head: two hours and 26 minutes until we can begin the evening ritual of pajamas, toothbrushes, books, tears, drama, drama, and more drama.  I just want to sit, with the hubs, and watch Sunday’s episode of Mad Men.  In reality, though, we’ll collapse into bed, Mark watching a documentary on his phone, me pinning endless recipes from Pinterest that I will never, ever attempt to make.  But, it will be calm and quiet, and for that we’ll be grateful.

But, that two hours and now 24 minutes will drag out for all it’s worth.  There is homework to be done, and even worse, Alex needs his fingernails cut.  I don’t know what it is, but I really believe that there is something on his extra chromosome that makes him despise having his nails cut.  His nails are longer than mine at this point, so we really can’t put it off any longer.  I wish we could.  It would make for a more enjoyable evening, that’s for sure.

Even if we did delay the fingernail trimming, there would surely be more chaos to deal with in its place.  Just a moment ago, the dog came flying through the room with the Twister mat in her mouth, my husband arrived home from work, and Addie just burst into spontaneous tears because she didn’t get all her homework problems correct.

Deep breaths.  It will all be ok.  It’s what we do.  (This is what I will continue to remind myself until I drift off to sleep tonight.)

Upon hearing about my daily adventures, I am often reminded by others (especially those with older children) that someday I’ll miss this chaos.  I’m sure I probably will.  But, at this very moment, I might just trade a moment of wistful reminiscence over wanting to bang my head through this desk.

No time to daydream about that, though.  There are tears to dry, dinner to make, laundry to refluff for the fourth time.  Chaos.  Messy, beautiful chaos.  I wouldn’t trade it (or these little chaos causing rugrats) for anything.  Their sweet hugs and sloppy bedtime kisses will give me the strength to get up and do it all again tomorrow.

This essay and I are part of the Messy, Beautiful Warrior Project — To learn more and join us, CLICK HERE! And to learn about the New York Times Bestselling Memoir Carry On Warrior: The Power of Embracing Your Messy, Beautiful Life, just released in paperback, CLICK HERE!

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10 Things

It’s Monday.  Not just any old Monday, but the Monday after Spring Break.  I’m so over this day.  My kids are currently running around upstairs – it sounds like they are ready to fall through the ceiling – because they will not stay in bed.  They are tired, I am tired, and we’re all just done.

This doesn’t lend itself well to a blog post.  Everyone complains about their kids not going to bed.  I don’t want to do that; it’s been done.  So, I will take a shortcut, and post a list.

I remember several months ago that a Facebook post went around where you had to list 10 things that people probably didn’t know about you.  Given tonight’s cranky attitude and exhaustion, I give you my list:

10 Things You (Probably) Don’t Know about Jen

1. I do not like salad dressing. Ok, to be fair, a lot of people already know this.  It’s something that everyone tends to have a difficult time accepting, though.  It has nothing to do with calories, or dieting; I just don’t like it.

2. I’m an introvert.  The thought of speaking in front of a group of people makes me break out in hives.  I would much rather spend time in a small group of friends rather than be at a huge party.

3. I don’t really enjoy movies.  I haven’t seen the full Star Wars series, or the Indiana Jones trilogy, and probably a bunch of other really popular films that everyone else on the planet has seen.

4. Similarly, I haven’t read any of the trendy book series.  From Harry Potter to Hunger Games, they haven’t had a place on my reading list.  (Note: I did read the very first Harry Potter book, and enjoyed it, but couldn’t get into the second one.)

5. I have a huge head.  Like, so big I can’t wear most hats.  It’s a problem in the summertime, especially, because I’m also very fair skinned and would like to hide under a big, floppy straw hat (that also plays into the whole introvert thing, too).

6. I love watching reruns of my favorite sitcoms on tv.  I do not watch most popular dramas; instead, I’m content watching the same episodes of Everybody Loves Raymond, Friends, and The Big Bang Theory. (My husband does not enjoy this.  He would rather watch documentaries.  Fortunately, he falls asleep first.)

7. Someday, I want to be a published author.  I used to want to be a children’s book author, but now, I think I might have a novel in there somewhere.  And, if you’re lucky, maybe even a memoir.

8. I love to shop, but I don’t like shopping for myself.  I always promise myself that it will be more fun to buy clothing for myself after I lose a few pounds.  Then I eat a cupcake.  I need to stop doing all of that.

9. I hate flying.  (I typically don’t use the word “hate”, but in this case, it’s true).  As a result, I have not traveled very much.  I think I’m missing out, but I have no idea how to conquer this particular fear.

10. I can swear like a sailor.  It escalates with alcohol consumption and time spent with friends without the kids.  I try to control it, but sometimes you really just need to let an f-bomb fly.

So, there you have it.  Any surprises there?  Anything about you that I don’t already know?  Do tell.